hey, happy friday! it’s a rainy day here in the SLC—i guess what they say about april showers is right! i don’t mind the rain, though.. it makes everything green and vibrant afterward. plus, we need it!
so, i got a comment on yesterday’s post that really struck a chord and i have decided to share it, share my thoughts, and open it up for discussion.
before diving in to my thoughts on the whole “doing it wrong” statement, i should probably address the thing about being sick. i realize that, because i choose to be a blogger, my life is often under a microscope. that’s fine, it’s my choice to share my life with you guys and what people take from my ramblings is not in my control. however, i did kind of laugh at this because of the “sick a lot” remark. the last time i was sick was exactly a year ago—to the day! i typically get sick once a year right around this time. prior to getting my tonsils out, i got sick all the time! i believe it was up to six times one year—ugh. but thanks to that surgery, i usually just get sick once a year. one and done.
not only am i rarely sick, the whole equating my sinus infection to not living a healthful life made me laugh. the healthiest people on the planet (which i am not) can get sick in a heartbeat. healthy people catch colds. heck, healthy people get cancer. even if you live and breathe health & fitness, you are not invincible. you will not escape sickness just by eating right and exercising and practicing healthy habits. sorry, that’s not the way life goes. which is why i replied to the comment with this:
anyway, the whole judging of how often i get sick aside, it’s actually the second part of the comment that i want to talk about.
“you are doing whatever you are doing horribly wrong.”
whatever i am doing? what is it, exactly, that i am “doing”? last time i checked, i was just living my life. how does one do that “wrong”?
is there a right or wrong way to live? well, that is a matter of opinion. and, to be quite honest, the opinion that matters most is your own. if you are living your life “right” according to you, then that is what matters most. (unless, of course, you are murdering people and robbing banks and whatnot.. then the law’s opinion probably matters quite a bit.)
yes–this blog talks about health. i like clean eating. i like fun workouts. i like health tips. i like fun facts. i like new recipes. i like old recipes. i like sharing my life with you.
but NEVER would i ever consider myself the epitome of health. shoot, i am not even close to it. let’s see.. what are some things i am “doing wrong” when it comes to the health world?
- i eat white bread. fried food. sugar. lots of sugar.
- i drink booze.. sometimes too much. all at once.
- then i cure my hangover with greasy food.
- i’m lazy by nature.
- i often only get 5-6 hours of sleep.
- i overeat all the time. geeez, i love food too much to stop!
- there are days where i log under 2,500 steps… less than 25% of the recommended amount for the average joe.
- i forget to floss.
- i’ll stay up past midnight and sleep past noon.
- i leave my contacts in for weeks at a time.
- i go to bed with make-up on more than i care to admit.
- i never, ever stretch.
- i chew too much gum.
- there are many days in my week without a vegetable in sight.
- i love butter. and mayo. and high fructose syrup-laden ketchup.
- my eggs aren’t always cage free. my beef isn’t always grass fed. my produce is only sometimes organic.
- i skip my vitamins and supplements alllll the time. super forgetful.
- sometimes i leave work at 4:30 PM and realize i haven’t drank a drop of water all day.
- i eat way too many carbs.
- i’ve been known to hit the tanning bed once or twice before a tropical trip.
look at that. i thought of twenty bullet points off the top of my head. just last night i ate two pieces of white bread toast with loads of butter at 1 AM and then went to bed with my makeup on and my contacts in and overslept. whoops!
and, yes, i realize that yesterday i was sick but i still went to a see my favorite band at 10 PM. and, shoot, i have been going to the gym this week even though i am not 100% better. i realize both of these things could have played a role in that whole not getting better as fast as possible thing.. but i made those choices regardless.
i am clearly doing this life thing wrong.
or.. am i? who is the judge?
i am not perfect. i am a far cry from it! but i am (mostly) happy. i say mostly because i am not the happiest most spunky girl in town. i have my downs. i have struggles. like i said, a far cry from perfect. but i wouldn’t take a step back, look at my life, and say that i am doing it wrong.
i love life. despite the occasional sickness. despite my mysterious GI issues. despite not being able to into all of the jeans i own. despite my marital problems. despite my twenty-bullet-point list of what i am doing “wrong”. it’s my life and it is my choice to be happy, despite anything in it that may be “wrong”, whether it is in my control or not. yeah—i know a lot of those things i CAN change.. and if i feel like i need to, i will. as for the things in my life that are going wrong, i always remember this quote:
i hope you never leave this blog after reading a post with the impression that i am preaching to you. with the impression that i am doing everything right and you should follow me in order to prevent yourself from doing it wrong. with the impression that i myself am the healthiest person around simply because i discuss health topics. because those, my friends, are all wrong impressions.
i’m just living. one day at a time. okay, maybe i’m doing it wrong, but i am sure enjoying the ride, learning from my mistakes, and trying to make the most of this life. after all, i’ve only got one to live.
no question.. just please share YOUR thoughts on this in the comments.
xo. janetha g.
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That comment would have struck me that strongly, as well. So I don’t blame you for wanting to address it.
Also, I love your blog. I have always loved it because of how you AREN’T preachy. You aren’t showing us just the highlights of your life to make it seem the ultimate in health or happiness. You present things with opinion, not with fact and judgement. That is why I like it! Reading your blog doesn’t make ME feel like I’M doing something wrong… some “healthy living blogs” do make me feel that way.
PS : I have chronic tonsillitis as well (haven’t had mine out) and I get sick often from it too, and I do eat really healthy! So, I guess I am doing it wrong, too!
As HORRIBLE as the surgery was, I am so glad I got them out. The recovery was a giant bitch, though. Ugh. But glad I did it.
Thanks for your thoughts! I appreciate the feedback. Love your blog, too, Shannon!
I swear I really was sick all the time until my tonsils were taken out. Now, it’s about once a year I get sick with the flu/cold.
Except for allergies, but honestly how can you control pollen?
I also had my tonsils out and I can honestly say that I don’t think I’ve had strep throat since I got them out about 10 years ago! My surgery was not bad at all actually, I was in and out in a few days! It was SO worth it, though. :)
I was a strep “carrier” and had my tonsils taken out 13 years ago… I’ve never gotten strep again! But I agree, recovery was pretty brutal. If your doctor recommends it and your insurance covers it, it would probably save you a lot of trouble to get it over with. Good luck!
after suffering strep and tonsilitis so many times every year i finally got mine out 3 years ago and it was the BEST decision i’ve ever made. i was back at work in a week and the worst part was just not being able to talk for a few days. since you’re used to throat pain the pain of the surgery won’t be bad at all and its only temporary. definitely consider getting it done, it has greatly improved my quality of life!
I don’t think that comment should have even warranted a response from you, let alone an entire post justifying your life to someone who has an opinion on the internets. It makes me wonder if something about that person’s comment really affected you/made you doubt your lifestyle? If so, why? If you truly didn’t care, I don’t think you would have written this post. I’m not saying this meanly, but asking what the purpose of calling out a nasty comment is.
I know it’s easier said than done, but really, you should just ignore that comment.
Blah blah opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy, haters gon’ hate, etc.
I didn’t really take it as a nasty comment. I wasn’t offended by it. It cultivated thoughts about if there is a RIGHT or a WRONG way to live, and who is the judge of it? I think that, especially in the blogging world, there is so much judgement about HOW you should live your life. What you should eat, how much you should work out, etc… and this reader’s comment brought those thoughts to the table, so I wanted to bring it up.
This post wasn’t meant to be a defense, rather a conversation starter. I am fine with the comment and don’t believe the person left it out of hate.
Love everything you said here, and laughed out loud a few times when reading because it’s true for everyone! Keep doing your thing :)
I think some readers have high expectations for the blogs they read. They somehow think the writer should be the “perfect” role model, never make mistakes and live a cookie cutter life. I think the reader’s don’t grasp the fact that the have a choice to read a blog, if they don’t like something they can simply stop reading and stop scrutinizing.
People who feel the need to say that kind of thing to someone as sweet and open as you on your blog- not preachy in the LEAST- obviously are unhappy people, and that kind of posting, when it comes right down to it, isn’t about you at ALL, but really a commentary on them. Don’t let the turkeys get you down, and feel better! Sinus infections are the worst.
Thanks, Amy! I don’t think that the original commenter is unhappy, necessarily. She most likely is just as happy as the next girl, I don’t get behind the idea that people who leave those comments are miserable/jealous haters/etc.. they are just voicing their opinion on my life. Which is fine, because I put my life on the internet, but that doesn’t mean I am not going to post my thoughts in return.
Miss you!
I would usually agree a far as attributing negative comments to the person being unhappy but in this persons case it reeks of haterism and she obviously puts a lot of negative judgements on things to imply that you of all ppl are living like “wrong” lol..if your life is wrong i dont wanna be right haha
I love your blog and I will scream it from the rooftops! Also I love your love of cereal. And carbs. And carrot cake. Wow, lots of c things.
Thank you so much for this post. I was LITERALLY just have a similar convo with someone last night and how many people judge others for the way the live their life! I am a BIG believer in DYOT (do your own thing). You have to do what works for you.
And all this Judgy McJudgerson from others is the main reason I could not blog!
And I do find the more judgmental people are the less they have their $hitz together!
Amen!
Your blog is the best! One of the ones I always look forward to reading! Thank you for sharing this-it has allowed me to reflect on my own personal feelings towards my lifestyle and what I deem healthy and unhealthy and why I make the choices I do.
I think this is my favorite post so far! Amen hallelujah! I have been following you for a few weeks now, and love it. I totally agree…to say ” your doing it wrong” pushes every button on me..there is no “right” way to live life! I have been so frustrated trying to figure out what even works best just for me… I hope you keep doing what your doing and blogging/telling us about it because it adds a little more ideas and joy into my day!
I love your blog, and your right as bloggers we put the information out there and many times we are judged by every little thing we do.
But I think as long as you know and the people who mean the most to you in life know the truth, then let those haters keep on hating!
If anything it makes for a fun post to talk about our haters =))
The internet give people balls. I’ve been struggling with this for about 19 years now (and then earlier in bbs’s). I don’t like how people can’t have a constructive conversation about stuff like this. Sure, call me out if I’m doing something stupid but let’s have a conversation about it (like we did with the juice/smoothies). I understand you wanting to justify what’s going on but there comes a point where you just have to ignore the snark.
Loved reading every second of this! I love your perfect, imperfect completely amazing self!!
Hatahs gonna’ hate.
You strike me as balanced, which is healthy! Seriously, I’ve 2 friends who are ~40 and who had to do inpatient time for anorexia 20 years ago. Eating disorders are like alcoholism–you’re always recovering. One of those friends had a serious relapse 5 years ago, and I was really, really scared for her. They have taught me the value of balance and helped me make peace with my body. Enjoy your indulgences! They’re a wonderful part of life.
This is one of the best blog posts Ive read in awhile. Loved it and Love you blog! :)
1. I used to get sick all the time before I had my tonsils out but ever since it’ been awesome!!
2. I can’t believe someone wrote that madness you never get sick!! I’m convinced ppl write certain outlandish things b/c they are pure haters and jealous!
3. your response is awesome as is your blog and please dont’ let ppl like this person get you down. does he/she leave comments often?
Love this post! And love your direct response to the comment even more! Go Janetha!
PS- is it May 17 yet?? ;) Gettin so excited for Blend!
Just do you.
Yep, that comment would’ve struck me just as strongly.. Personally, I love your blog because of how honest you are and how it seems like no topics are off the table for you. Open discussion is what blogging should be all about. I really admire that! I agree that there’s no “right” or “wrong” way to live life (within reason, obviously) and if you’re happy, then that’s what truly matters.
Your complete openness & honesty just tells me you’re doing it “right”. You are living your life how YOU want & sounds like you enjoy it! Don’t let anyone judge you, if they have an issue they shouldn’t be reading. Hope you feel better :)
AMEN! I have to agree with you on ‘even if you live and breathe health & fitness, you are not invincible’….my husband is one of the healthiest people I know and has fought cancer twice! No reason why my husband, who works out most days, eats a very healthy diet, has never smoked or done any drugs should end up with first, testicular cancer and then last year colon cancer. He is living proof that you can do ‘it all right’ and still end up sick.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Love reading your blog every day!
i’m chewing gum now, haven’t washed my hair in a week, drink wine every night, and skipped breakfast yesterday. EEEK! Somebody call the Healthy living blogger police to lock me up!
Okay okay, not really. But i’m guessing if we all were that PERFECTLY HEALTHY PERSON, we be living in a bubble.
Love you woman. Healthy MIND!
You’re great!!!
I love this post! And you! Personally people are always going to judge us–but that’s totally their problem. However, I love how you addressed this–it’s not addressed enough in this blog land. And I love that you’re so real!
I will never be that girl who does it all perfectly–oh, and I’ve hit the tanning bed too. And I love, love ice cream, pizza (even that ‘bad’ kind). And leave mascara on my lashes every night. Whoops. ;)
I’ve been lurking on your blog for a while now, and NEVER have I thought you were preachy. I enjoy your healthy living tips, and I appreciate you putting your life out there even though there are buttheads who will judge everything you do and say. You are great, thanks so much for your ideas and information! I hope you have a great weekend!
I don’t usually comment on blogs but felt compelled to say great post!
Well said and If contacts in for weeks is wrong I don’t want to be right! :)
So good, I read it twice. You are awesome.
This is the first post I’ve read of yours – I clicked on the link Lindsay Cotter tweeted. I plan on being a regular reader from now on. What a stupid, mean, unkind, thoughtless comment from that reader! Infections/viruses don’t discriminate between the healthy and unhealthy among us!! I LOVE this response by you. It’s exactly right.
I think it’s great you addressed this and who is someone to judge what you are doing. It’s there problem, not yours. I’ve started to realize that what people think of me have nothing to do with me and their thoughts aren’t my business. Plus, people really only get a snapshot of our lives, definitely not the whole picture.
I love the response you gave, you be you and that’s the best thing to do!
I read your blog everyday because I love what you write, and your an honest and good person.
Hope you’re feeling better now!
Love this! I admire how honest u are. There are soo many ppl out there big into fitness who make it seem like if u eat something fried, dnt workout everyday, etc that its a big deal. Literally seen a girl on instagram I was following take a pic of a cupcake with a look of disgust on her face and put a caption of ‘a coworker gave me a cupcake. What am I supposed to do with this’. I was thinking ‘eat it, bish’ lol! I immediately unfollowed her. Anyways,it just irks me to see ppl act like all the fried foods and sweets are disgusting. Noone is perfect and this life is to live it the way u want and enjoy the hell out of it.
What’s up lately!? I’ve been seeing more and more bloggers taking the hit on everything! From what they’re eating, to what they wear, not being thin enough or being too thin. The reason I wanted to start my blog was to share and inspire, not be judged. No one is perfect but that’s why we share our stories; to learn, inspire and HELP one another, not critique and judge.
I give you many kudos for addressing this. Love you for keeping it real!
Whew! This post got my attention like you wouldn’t believe. First off I’d like to say before I got my tonsils out (I was 20) I could count on having colds and strep throat a few times a year. Second typically when I train for a distance race or I am exercising more than my body can handle, I’m more likely to catch some type of sickness because my immune system is lower. I now believe after a few years of typing to figure out the lifestyle that worked for me, there is a such thing as “too healthy” and I wasn’t living life to my fullest because I always thought I needed to follow the “healthy guidelines” which made me deprive myself from things I enjoy but then I realized that was no way to live & just needed to do things in moderation.
good for you! this post made me laugh (the part where you share what you’re “doing wrong”) and who seriously wastes their time and comments negatively? dumb. i’ve never known a perfect person and frankly i wouldn’t like to. i rarely get sick too (quote me on that! but knock on wood….) and i do consider myself very “healthy” in general :) though i do have my vices!!
I love you! I love you! I love you! I think the reason why I love you so very much is because you are one of the most real and authentic people I’ve ever met. Anyone that knows you, sees this immediately too. You rock girl, always keep doing what you’re doing because it’s working!!!
This is such a well articulated post, Janetha.
I have so much to say, and can’t articulate any of it very well. So just want to say, awesome post. Keep doing your thing.
I love this post.
I feel like we are constantly bombarded with what is RIGHT when it comes to being healthy. Every day there is a new thing you NEED to be eating. Or something that was considered healthy now is a big no no.
Man, it is hard to keep up! and quite frankly I don’t want to.
I say if you are in good health (and like you said you have been sick once this year). Do what works for YOU and makes YOU happy.
I suffer from undiagnosed GI distress so (fortunately? unfortunately?) have to eat a rather mundane, repetitive, clean diet to avoid issues and even then, it is a crap shoot (pun intended).
Does that mean I don’t “slip up”? Umm no. I’ve been known to screw myself pre half marathon by sugar overload by means of teddy grahams dunked in icing (its glorious!) or eating half a box of cereal and feeling blimp. Mmm carbs will never be wrong.
I think when it comes to healthy living, as long as you ARE healthy (I’m not advocating being overweight and thinking it is alright and you only live once so just don’t care) then make choices that make you happy.
PS I don’t even want to begin to entertain making a list of everything I am doing “wrong” :)
Well said! Blogging definitely has the ‘under-the-microscope’ aspect to it, which is unfortunate. I think blogs are a means of sharing our lives with people, and most people’s lives include sugar. and refined carbs. and alcohol. That is real life, and it a lot more enjoyable that way.
Good for you…loved reading this. Yes,you’re a blogger and you choose to put your life out there but what is with these high and mighty people that are so tough behind a computer, phone, tablet – whatever! Thank god you’re not perfect ~ how boring would that be?
i saw that comment this morning and it ticked me off a little. i dont understand why people take time out of their day to write comments like that.. if you dont agree, stop reading. i love your blog and look forward to your posts everyday. i also believe that one person’s way of life should not be compared to another person’s way of life.
UGH. Comments like that chick’s piss me off. This is supposed to be a supportive environment. We read because we like each other, not because we’re here to judge. You can be the most fit, health conscious, well rounded person in the universe, but you can’t do anything about a virus. That’s just ridonk.
xo.
You’re my favorite blog. I feel like we would surely be friends if we were in the same vicinity. I enjoy “looking thru your windows”…never thought to judge you! Geez!
Longtime reader, first time commenter. Just wanted to say one of the reasons I l-o-v-e your blog is because of your honesty–you keep it real (and as someone who also struggles with GI issues, it helps a ton to hear about how you deal) :) Silly haters…
I couldn’t have worded it more precisely. Plus, you’re awesome. We all know that! Hope you are 100% soon!
Do whatever makes you happy. If we all stuck to the rules 100% of the time, life wouldn’t be worth it. And who gets to make the rules? Your body is your business, you choose what is best for you, no one can tell you that you’re doing it wrong.
This was a great post – thanks for the laugh and the reminder that no one is perfect. I for one love living my perfectly imperfect life. Bring on the sugar!
I had to scroll quickly to miss any “haters gonna hate” – and I respect that your reply is not defensive, and that you say no, this person isn’t necessarily “unhappy” (possibly just a longtime reader who recalls how often you used to get sick?). thanks for that.
much like the “stop the glorification of busy”, I think there is far too much “I have SO MANY unhealthy habits!” (this is NOT directed at you – I think your list is largely made up of relatively “normal” things, and your good habits equal / outweigh them). I always floss, though ;)
I can say this because I used to be the same way. I was incredibly active and therefore always declared “I can eat ANYTHING I want!”. and I did. I drank like a fish (ah, college!) and ate crazy good food.
as I get older and cannot simply play tennis for six hours a day, teach a step class 5x a week and teach weight training 3x (my typical schedule in college and several years after), I obviously have to adjust.
totally not doing everything right over here, I swear LOUDLY by that “everything in moderation” thing – but what does NOT go along with my healthier ways is judgement of any kind. everyone is free to make their own choices, and aside from begging my dearest friends to quit smoking, my concern is for what I do. that’s all.
I do agree that with a blog, one opens themselves up to all kinds of critics and skeptics, and I welcome those who are thoughtful and insightful. this comment was not that, but your reply was. thanks again for not reacting defensively, as seems to be the blogger norm.
You’re amazing. The fact that you eat white bread and fried food and drink a lot doesn’t make you unhealthy, it makes you human. You balance it with exercise and veggies when you can.
As a blogger, I ALWAYS feel the pressure to be the best health blogger. If I’m out with friends, I worry that they’ll judge me not “being healthy” if I order fries instead of a salad. But you know what? Health is about YOU, and what makes YOU feel good. Maybe that’s eating 5 slices of white bread, maybe it’s running a mile. As long as you feel balanced, then who cares about others impressions?
I adore you and your blog. Because of shit like this.
I love you! Who exactly lives a perfectly healthy life??? We blog to share our stories, not to tell people how to live. Oh heavens…. I don’t think any of us want that responsibility! I love you and your blog because you take people how they are…good, bad, and ugly. You are one of the most open and nonjudgemental women I know. Can’t wait to hug you at Blend… and I’ll even bring you some dental floss. ;)
Hello there,
Been following for almost two years, I have personally learned and been inspired, both to live a little healthier and stick to my goals;) I live in Sugarhouse, too, so I especially appreciate your health/fitness tips. And hello Trader Joes?? Changed my perspective on life. Haha.
Long story, I am not trendy nor savvy enough for a blog or facebook or twitter or instagram or any social media, but I am hooked on fitness blogs!
Lastly, after two YEARS this entry only brings out the trite and obvious: Amen. Amen sister!
Carry on, you have certainly enhanced my pursuit if healthier living.
Sara
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